Learning/Wishing

 We did our first Gulf Dive Yesterday.  Wow. Not as scary as I thought.  Actually calm, relaxing, beautiful.  Even with low visibility and spending the first dive wasting all of my air bouncing up and down like a yo-yo.  The second time in, we fixed my weighting, used the air diving, had better visibility, cooler structures, and a bonded with a little blue and yellow fish that reminded me of BB (the parakeet) and was perfectly willing to go home with me if I had asked.

I love that we are doing this, and am especially happy that the darling girl gets to have really cool experiences growing up.  I do spoil my child. If it is in my power to let her do or try anything, as long as she learns and follows safety precautions, is willing to put the time in to do something safely and conscientiously, I will try to make it happen.  Not a big fan of buying her things.  Every electronic gadget she owns (which is a bunch) she either bought herself or was a gift from not-the-mommy.

Someone asked me the other day what I wished for my daughter.  The knee-jerk reaction was what my Mom always said: "I wish that she grows up happy."  But I really don't.  Wishing is something you do when there is an element of chance in the outcome.  The smaller the odds the more fervent the wish.  I wish that she has a great job, that she enjoys and pays her a comfortable income (small wish - she has the skills, internal drive and practical nature that makes this nearly a given).  I wish that I get at least one grand-child out of the deal (bigger wish - who knows what path she'll take, she likes kids, but has such big dreams and ambitions, and just because maternal bliss is my path doesn't make it hers). I want a million things for my daughter, but mostly I want her to make decisions that will build her character and keep her always engaged in her life.

Happiness?  This is the one thing in our world that we have complete control over.  I can't wish happiness for her, because nothing in the world: money, relationships, career, experience, family, candy, toys, world peace, global domination, NOTHING can make you happy.  Happy is a choice.  I fervently wish that my daughter understands this and makes this choice, but I have no control over this.  The universe at large, whom I generally expect to deliver my wishes, has no jurisdiction over this.  Only the Darling Daughter can make herself happy.  All I can do is try to show her what happy looks like.  And I am happy, very, very happy. :-)